For over a period of time, certain questions about when is the right time for a man or woman to marry have been on my mind? Who should give a lady go ahead to marry? Is there any role for religious institution Leaders? How best can one go about it are part of many questions begging for answers?
But in the last one week, I got a clue to many of the questions bothering me.
The Son of President Muhammadu Buhari, Yusuf recently got married to Zahra, daughter of Emir Bichi, Alhaji Nasir Bayero who is just 20 years Old. She is a 400 Level architectural student of a UK University. The wedding was the talk of the town and many wished to have that flamboyant type of marriage. Why? Maybe because she married the son of the President and nobody questioned why she didn’t finish University or maybe at 20 years,she is still young and may not have enough experience about how to keep a home.
The father in an interview with a popular newspaper said he is very close to his daughter and would have wanted her to finish school before getting married and stayed a little longer with her but we cannot change what God has ordained.
In other ways, many have criticised young girls getting married to their man in School saying why are they in a hurry or why shouldn’t they just wait to finish school. But the wedding of President Buhari’s son has showed that the rich can do whatever they like while the poor or average are the ones that needed to follow man made laws.
In a sermon delivered by Pastor Enoch Adeboye of the Redeemed Christian Church of God available online explained that once a man is working and can provide for his wife and children, he or she is fit to marry.
He further explained that the most important thing in marriage is Parents’ consent followed by other things considered necessary. This answers the legitimacy of who and who should have the final say as regards saying “I do”. This means that, if you are waiting for your Pastor or Imam’s Validation other than your parents concern and your purse, then you are doing that at your own peril.
What about marriage counselling by registry and Churches, how important are they? Yes, it is also important because you will listen to the experience of others and have an idea of what you should expect. But in all, the story of your counsellors can never be your own so what is important for you is to understand that marriage is only for those who are ready to be committed and have a lot of patience.
Is marriage compulsory to fulfill destiny? The word of God didn’t answer that part but the Bible which is the Christian’s guide mentioned in Proverbs 18:22 that he who finds a wife findeth a good thing and obtain favour from the Lord.
In all, once you obtain favour from the Lord, everything becomes easy for you.
What about a single man, why can’t they be favoured? They will also be favoured but in marriage,it is endless.
In all, make no marriage an example. Bill gates with all the money he had, the wife still filed for a divorce.
Another lesson from the wedding, never fight any politician for another. Politics is a game of interest. Despite the political differences between PDP and APC, Former President Goodluck Jonathan, Former Vice President Atiku Abubakar Still attended President Buhari Son’s wedding.
So money, influence and religious Leader’s validation cannot keep a marriage but the only thing that can is prayer, perseverance and commitment.
By Tosin Adesile